A Christmas Carol Retrospective: Part 12

Brett B
26 min readDec 23, 2020

Christmas Carol (1999)

This version was a made-for-TV movie for the TNT network, with Patrick Stewart starring as Scrooge. I found it free to watch on tubi through my cable provider. While Stewart is known for his roles as Jean-Luc Picard on Star Trek: The Next Generation or Professor Charles Xavier in X-Men, he also has ties to a Christmas Carol, as he has starred in a one-man show version on stage where he portrays every character. This filmed version followed after the success of his stage productions.

It starts with some very solemn music, and a carriage carrying a casket. It’s revealed to be Jacob Marley’s. Scrooge unemotionally watches the casket get buried and he signs Marely’s death certificate.

He has a conversation with the undertaker, Mr. Crump, where he says Jacob is “dead as a doornail” but doesn’t know what is particularly dead about a doornail. This conversation is an interesting take on fitting in some narrative writing that appears in the beginning of the book about the nature of the phrase “dead as a doornail”. Mr. Crump suggests that “doorknocker” might be more apt, which I guess is to foreshadow Jacob’s appearance on the knocker. The priest says that Christmas Eve must be the reason why there are so few in attendance, and Scrooge points out that at least Marley was spared that in his final hours.

He moves to his business, where Bob Cratchit slowly tries to add more coal to the fire, which Scrooge notices and suggests he poke the coals rather than add more. Fred arrives and shushes Bob on the way in so that he can startle Scrooge with his “Merry Christmas!”. He has the usual argument, but he defends Bob after Bob applauds and when Scrooge chastises him for being married, he says Scrooge never visited him before he was married either.

“You find my nephew amusing, Cratchit? You’re another Christmas lunatic like him”, Scrooge says.

We’re introduced to the charity guys on the street, where they ask Fred for directions to Scrooge and Marley’s. They say their collecting for the poor and as they leave Fred gives a wry grin. He could have at least warned the poor guys! They come into Scrooge’s business and introduce themselves as Mr. Williams and Mr. Foster and offer their sympathies when Scrooge tells them Marley has been dead for seven years. They say they are collecting for the poor and Scrooge smiles and asks if they are new to this district and dismisses them as usual.

A group of caroling children sing in front of a business and get a small donation. One of the children says he is going to try Scrooge’s and the others tell him not to go. (Singing “Good King Wenceslas” the same song Bean was singing in the Muppet version). Scrooge angrily appears at the door with a ruler, scaring him away. Scrooge gives Bob his leave.

Scrooge makes his way home, where Jacob’s face appears like a fog over the door knocker, which does physically transform and Jacob’s face howls a bit. With a “Humbug” he heads inside and up to his bedroom. He sits eating by the fire and looks at his fireplace tiles, which book-accurately show some Bible scenes depicted on them. One, which I am guessing is supposed to be Cain murdering Abel, slowly begins to morph, with Cain’s face turning into Marley’s. While kind of creepy, I chuckled because the end result looks a lot like Vigo the Carpathian’s painting from Ghostbusters 2. The face jumps to another tile and Scrooge chalks it up to indigestion.

The bells begin to ring and Marley’s ghost phases through his bedroom door, chains in tow. He screams at Scrooge when he suggests he is not real. Marley undoes his bandage and his jaw drops with some creepy-CGI, which oddly doesn’t seem to bother Scrooge, who just pushes his jaw shut again. It’s also interesting to note that in his usual speech, Marley says he doesn’t know why he is able to appear to Scrooge now, which is kind of weird, but he does mention that the Spirits will come on three separate nights.

He points out the window and we see an eerie shot of many spirits in the night and one who tries to help the mother and child but cannot.

Christmas Past looks like an old-ish man with long hair and a creepy smile looking kind of like a Twilight vampire. His bedroom phases away into the woods near his school. They head into the school where Scrooge sees his lonely boyhood self and the Spirit asks why he never went home for Christmas. Scrooge says he wasn’t wanted and that his father turned against him when his mother died. “That’s hard”, the Spirit says. “Life is hard!” Scrooge retorts.

His sister shows up, called “Fran” here instead of Fan and they ride off on the carriage together. They skip forward together to Fezziwig’s, where Mr. Fezziwig asks young Scrooge and Dick Wilkins to clean up for the party.

As the guests arrive, old Scrooge points out Fezziwig has three daughters and a boy has young Scrooge perform a magic trick where he pulls a coin from behind the boy’s ear. Fezziwig performs a song about marrying a girl named Rose, then calls for a polka and they all dance. Belle arrives at the party and young Scrooge gives her a kiss before they dance. “The world changes, you can’t trust anything”, Scrooge says.

We change to Belle and Scrooge walking down a country road. Scrooge does not wish to see, but the spirit gives him no choice. We see Belle break it off and old Scrooge compels his younger self to go after her. Scrooge asks to be taken home and he uses the cap to extinguish the Spirit.

Scrooge awakens in his bed and hears the Ghost of Christmas present, who looks traditional with a torch in tow. The Ghost sprinkles dust on the people’s food on the street and he says that the poor need it most. He takes Scrooge to the Cratchit house, where he blesses the house. Daughter Martha arrives and says she stayed over at the place she is working, Scrooge notes that she is a hardworking young woman. The Spirit says she has to be!

Bob and Tiny Tim arrive to the usual fanfare and then we get a pretty long scene of them eating their goose and then eating their pudding. The Spirit points out that there is nothing wrong with the pudding, except it is so small for a family so large.

As they toast to Scrooge, Mrs. Cratchit observes “He’ll be as merry as a wet graveyard on Sunday”, which the Spirit seems to find funny. Tiny Tim begins to sing a rendition of “Silent Night”.

Scrooge is whisked away in a tornado to a lighthouse, where two of the keepers are also singing Silent Night. They quickly depart to a ship on the sea, where some men sing as well, but in German. We also see the mine as well!

Then the Spirit flies Scrooge to Fred’s party, where Scrooge is the topic of discussion. A girl named Betsy is taken aback by the forwardness of a Mr. Haines, who says “Everyone I like calls me Topper”. I love how his introduction almost seems like a Marvel easter egg or something, like fans watching this will be excited to see Topper show up. Fred refuses to say anything against his uncle, and his wife asks why. Fred says that Scrooge suffers enough from himself. Topper heats up a fire poker at Fred’s request and puts it in the punch, which makes it boil a bit, which I thought this was pretty weird, but I found an article mentioning that Dickens himself wrote of something similar in a letter and is referred to at the end of the novella when Scrooge says he will discuss Bob’s affairs over a “bowl of smoking bishop”.

Scrooge says he sometimes forgets that Fred is Fran’s child. The Spirit says it is time to go, but the partygoers begin playing games and Scrooge asks to stay. He sees Topper play blindman’s bluff and he points out that he’s cheating. He catches “Betsy” under the mistletoe and they kiss.

They prepare to leave again, but Scrooge hears piano playing and says it was his sister’s favorite tune. They do leave and the Spirit begins to gray and show his age. The Spirit reveals Ignorance and Want, who look like feral children that hiss at Scrooge.

The bell tolls and Scrooge runs but is stopped by the Spirit of Christmas Yet to Come, which appears like a floating black cloak, but has two little glowing eyes beneath the hood that make it look like a Jawa. He’s taken to the Stock Exchange where he sees the businessmen discuss the funeral. When the Spirit points it’s kind of comical to just see a normal white hand come out of the cloak (albeit it with some gnarly long fingernails).

Next the Spirit takes him to a destitute alley and into Old Joe’s shop, where the undertaker, laundress, and charlady all come in together. The Undertaker is Mr. Crump, the same man Scrooge spoke to at Marley’s funeral.

Scrooge is then taken to his body under the covers, but he says he does not have the power to look. He asks if no one has any emotion associated with this man’s death. We finally see the couple who are happy that their debt will be transferred and the wife says she never thought she would feel happiness with a death.

Scrooge corrects the spirit and asks for tenderness and he is taken to the Cratchits, where Bob is mourning Tim’s body on his bed and then he speaks about seeing Fred who expressed his sympathies.

Scrooge walks out and is immediately in the cemetery and he’s pointed to his own grave, which cracks in two and as he walks inside he falls into his own coffin and comes face to face with his own corpse as he plummets downwards before quickly awakening in his room.

Scrooge has a weird moment where as he realizes all is well, he begins to choke and it comes out as a laugh (as if he hasn’t laughed ever). He offers the boy out the window a shilling to buy the prize turkey (but it sounds like it’s painful for him to offer money) and pays the poulterer to send it to Bob. He makes his way down the road complimenting people, and even throws a snowball when some kids hit him with one. He swings by a church, and is confused for a moment that he needs to remove his hat and sings along with “God Rest Ye, Merry Gentlemen.”

He makes his way to Fred’s where he paces outside and finally knocks and goes in where he asks if Fred’s wife will accept him which she gladly does and then he dances along with the piano. We cut to Scrooge awaiting Bob at his business the next day, where he pranks him and tells him to buy another coal scuttle before he dots another “i”!

Fred narrates the ending where he reads the last bit from the book and Tiny Tim who is held up by Scrooge gives a final “God bless us, everyone!”

This might be the most accurate live action version yet. There are quite a few obscure scenes that I have not seen in any of the films so far, including the lighthouse, ship, and mine, the debtors feeling relief over Scrooge’s death, and the single spirit trying to help the mother and child, and the interesting beginning where Scrooge is at Marley’s funeral, which is mentioned in a passing way in the novella through narration. A very large amount of the dialogue is lifted straight from the book, with very little changes. But does that make this version the best? Not particularly, as I still prefer the Scott version. I enjoy Patrick Stewart as an actor quite a bit, but it’s hard to shake Captain Picard or another of his roles from this one. He doesn’t get too into character and some parts, particularly the ending, seem like a bit of overacting. The supporting cast is okay, but the portrayal of Bob is not as sympathetic as some of the others. The production values are also a little low, particularly with some of the spirits that are disappointingly cheap-looking. I don’t mean to knock it too hard, as I think this is overall a very good production and one worth seeing due to its accuracy and themes, so I still give it a solid recommendation.

A Christmas Carol: The Movie (2001)

Yes, that’s really what it’s titled, confusingly. This is an animated version produced by a British studio called the Illuminated Film Company. I had difficulty finding it on any streaming service and ended up renting it from Amazon Prime Video.

To continue the confusion, it opens with a live action segment, which had me thinking it was the wrong movie. Which has happened to me already, because so many are simply named “A Christmas Carol”, streaming services tend to mix up descriptions and years! The live action segment it opens with says “Boston — 1867”, which furthers the confusion. Charles Dickens himself steps out of a carriage, played by Simon Callow (call me uncultured, but I recognized him as the villain from Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls), who also voices Scrooge in the animated segments. Dickens is apparently reading the Christmas Carol to a packed theater (he did do live readings in his lifetime, so this isn’t inaccurate.)

He prepares to start and says he will be reading a story of ghosts, to which a girl in the audience screams, but it’s reveals she screamed at a mouse (a rather lame CGI one too). Dickens says he is upstaged by the mouse, and says he could start his story with a mouse making its way through London and we transition to hand drawn animation. We start with Scrooge at the exchange, where he gains some properties from a Mr. Leach. The narrator says this brings us to the mouse, and we see the inside of a poorhouse, where three children are excited to a mouse they named Gabriel has come back. The nurse taking care of the children is named “Belle” and is voiced by Kate Winslet.

We cut back to Scrooge who walking down a busy street and he is stopped by Old Joe, who he gives the ledger book he got from Mr. Leach to take care of. Old Joe takes the book to what looks like a prison and comes out riding on a carriage. Meanwhile, Scrooge pushes a blind beggar out of the way and complains about the snow. The carriage with Old Joe is revealed to be rounding up people to put in debtors prison.

Scrooge goes to his business where a mouse runs along a ledger book on his desk. He eyes it up, makes sure Bob isn’t watching, then calls it “his assistant” and gives it a block of cheese asking if it’s “adequate remuneration”. The guy who just pushed a blind man is giving mice cheese?!

We cut to nurse Belle, who says Tiny Tim can go home for Christmas and puts Gabriel the mouse on his head. I am pretty sure Victorian-era people would not be so happy and touchy with vermin, but let’s roll with it. Mrs. Cratchit takes Tim away and thanks the doctor and nurse. Belle mentions being behind on payments to Mr. Leach and the debtors prison guys immediately show up to take the doctor away and they tell Belle he won’t be back unless she pays off his debt. She goes to Mr. Leach, who explains all of their debts were transferred to Scrooge, who she seems to know.

Belle tries to write a letter to Scrooge and she goes through many revisions. Belle arrives at his place of business and asks to see Scrooge, but Bob says he’s out. Bob says that he has been instructed to tell all debtors the same thing, so she gives Bob her letter, which Bob is put off by.

Belle visits the doctor in prison and he says that Scrooge will not help as he is as dark and cold as the prison.

Fred sees Scrooge as he is entering the business. He asks Scrooge to dinner, but Scrooge asks if he came last year or the year before. He has no intention of being lured to a supper party. Fred says he loves his wife (named Alice). He rushes Fred out and tells Cratchit to never marry, but Cratchit says he already is, which is greeted by a “Humbug!”

Bob tries to tell him about Belle, but Scrooge is busy ranting about boiling Christmas lovers in pudding, and her letter gets knocked off the shelf, which Gabriel the mouse tries to go after, but he falls in a bucket of water. Scrooge’s mouse helps him out and they don’t look too friendly to one another. (It should be noted that these are drawn like oddly realistic mice, so seeing them do anthropomorphic things is weird. They don’t look very “cartoony” at all). Some carolers sing outside his window with Fred, and Scrooge opens the window and pours water on them.

The two mice argue about the letter in squeaks and Scrooge begins to close up with the typical speeches about Bob having Christmas off. Bob leaves and the mice pull the letter out, which Scrooge notices, even patting his mouse on the head for being tidier than Bob. He tucks the letter in his coat pocket for later and prepares to leave, but his clock starts spinning madly and Jacob Marley’s ghost comes in through the window of his business for a change.

Marley is hilariously voiced by Hollywood legend, Nicolas Cage, who doesn’t bother doing much more than his normal voice and certainly isn’t even trying a British accent. He is constantly getting pulled out the window during his spiel until he joins a bunch of other spirits outside and flies away. The mice are pretty freaked out if you’re worried about them, I know I was.

Scrooge is frightened by a knock on the door, and it turns out to be the charity guys, who are coming to businesses after closing, I guess? Scrooge dismisses them while he closes up and leaves the shop, while the mice hitch a ride along in his pocket.

Bob is making his way home as well and he slides on some ice on the way. He is welcomed by his family, but Tiny Tim already seems to be down with an illness. His mother points out he just got back from the hospital. We see a snippet of Belle wondering if Scrooge will forsake her again.

Scrooge arrives at home and his door knocker transforms into Marley’s face. Old Joe stops Scrooge before he goes inside to tell him how he’s been doing, but Scrooge says to spare the details and he leaves. As Scrooge sits to eat, the mice conspire to get the letter and Scrooge is shocked to see one. But he says he’ll be welcome company for the night and lets him eat some of his porridge. This is Scrooge, right? He opens the letter and beings to read, but falls asleep before he can.

The ghost of Christmas Past arrives with a flaming head and a cap. It changes from old to young and back again. It pulls Scrooge (and one of the mice, the other is left behind) through the wall and into the past. Young Scrooge sits alone at school and an adult (his teacher maybe?) arrives and asks what he did that no one would want to see him at Christmas. Young Scrooge cries and even the mouse joins in. Time moves forward and Fan arrives to take him home. As they get in the carriage, Fan introduces him to her dear friend, Belle.

The Spirit then takes him to his home. Where his father asks if he has spent his money well in educating Scrooge and wants a return on his “investment”. He will send him to Fezziwig’s as an apprentice.

Scrooge is taken forward to Fezziwig’s where he asks young Scrooge to help make a ballroom for the party. Old Scrooge remembers Belle and Fan is at the party as well, with her love interest “Frederick”, who I presume is Fred’s father. Young Scrooge sits in a carriage with Belle and tells her his dreams of the future which he is saving for.

Scrooge travels again to see a man reading his father’s will, where Scrooge is left with everything, and Fan’s husband is disowned and given nothing. Scrooge says his father never approved and was a man of principles and that Fan died giving birth to his nephew Fred.

We warp again to Scrooge “proposing” to Belle, as she points out, with a business contract. She breaks up with him as he appears to only care about gain. Young Scrooge burns the contract while Old Scrooge pleads not to, and he is taken back to his room where the spirit leaves. As he sleeps, the mouse opens his letter and reads it (because if Remy the rat can cook, this mouse can read, I guess).

Scrooge is awoken by the Spirit of Christmas Present, who is a typical jolly giant with a large torch in hand. He says he has much to show Scrooge and takes him (and the two mice who tag along) on a trippy animated flight with swirling colors and abstract movement. The Spirit uses his torch to stop an argument. They continue to fly by carolers, and Scrooge says his torch didn’t do their bad singing much good, but the Spirit says it is what you hear with your heart that matters. The animation continues to be abstract, almost like the 1971 short film version, but not nearly as good looking. They fly to the mine, ship, and lighthouse in the same way. They fly to the prison and sprinkle dust, and color comes to the dark building.

The Spirit drops him off at Fred’s, where they are playing the “Yes or No” game with Scrooge as the answer, and the animation is back to normal. Fred defends his invitation to Scrooge and says he’ll keep inviting him.

We then see Old Joe repossessing a bunch of belongings from people in the street, including a poor child’s box of toys. Scrooge tells the Spirit it’s just business and the Spirit blows out his torch and shows him Ignorance and Want in a dark void, who are ugly, growling children. He says Want can help itself for a while, but that Ignorance cannot help itself and can only change from the inside out, and we get a disturbing shot where its skin festers away and then its skull disintegrates. Yeesh.

Scrooge is finally taken to the Cratchits. The Spirit says he should remember the boy, but Scrooge does not and the mice scold him for it. Bob offers a toast to Scrooge, but Mrs. Cratchit is angry and reveals that Tiny Tim is the boy who was splashed by Scrooge’s bucket of water and blames his illness being worse for it. Scrooge asks him what the future holds, but he says he does not know and disappears.

The third Spirit appears, a cloak with an abstract skull face under the hood that fades in and out. When Scrooge asks if Tim will live, the Spirit fades and his cloak becomes the Cratchits at dinner mourning Tim. He asks the Spirit if he is the cause of this sadness, it disappears again and turns into the men who are talking about the funeral.

It then shows the scene of the laundress, charwoman, and undertaker selling possessions to Old Joe. We then get a scene of the doctor and Belle where the doctor celebrates that “he” can no longer bleed them, but surely whoever there debts are transferred to won’t be as cruel as Scrooge! Scrooge realizes that he is the dead man, and a spectral chain wraps around him. Bob is shown at Tim’s grave and Scrooge tries to speak to him, but the chain pulls him back. Marley appears and pulls Scrooge’s chain and he flies away with the other Spirits, but awakens in his bed.

He opens his window and yells to the boy below (but is kind of mean, not believing that it’s Christmas and only one night has passed). He realizes it and wishes he knew how to change, to which one of the mice squeaks and points out the window. “Of course!” Scrooge says, as if that made absolute sense to him. He apologizes to the boy and asks him to buy the biggest turkey he can find and deliver it to Bob.

Scrooge finally notices the letter again and resolves to not let Belle down again. He drops off some cheese and cake for the mice before heading out. He buys some oranges and hands them out to folks on the street. We get a weird little scene of the Spirits of Past and Present showering Scrooge with leaves and dust and making him fly, then he is reminded of Old Joe and the people collecting the debtors.

We cut to Belle crying and a song begins playing. It’s called “What If” and is sung by Kate Winslet. Interestingly, it actually charted number one in a few European countries when it was released. While it plays, Scrooge asks Old Joe for the money he’s collected, Scrooge gives the beggar he hit before some of it.

Scrooge spends some “montage-time” staring at boats in a harbor and when the song is done, he runs into Belle, who he tells he would do anything he could to change the terrible things that have happened, which she says is out of his power. He says it’s too late to change what he’s done, but she says it isn’t and that he has a lot to give to those who need it.

The doctor is released from prison, and Cratchit is running late for work. Bob points out that there are two mice on his shoulder, to which Scrooge says to not pay attention to them, they were here on time! He announces that he’s going to quadruple Bob’s salary and that he’ll help his family however they can. Should they be Scrooge and Cratchit or Cratchit and Scrooge?

Dickens narrates the last few lines, except he adds that Gabriel the mouse came to the New World and brought his friend with, who gave a lady in the front row a scare and we see two animated mice spliced into the live action footage of him on stage. He adds “That was the story of a Christmas Carol. Not quite the same one I wrote in the book, I admit.” He says “God Bless you” to a standing ovation, and two ugly CGI mice kiss each other on the stage.

Whew. This one has definitely taken the 1st place spot in “most unnecessary changes”. I love how they add the “not quite what I wrote in the book”, as if that absolves them of completely twisting the story around. The animation isn’t too bad, and some of the scenes look quite good with some fluid movement and colors. The voice acting is pretty good, except for Marley. I love Nicolas Cage at his craziest, but even I can’t defend this lame performance. I applaud them for not making this a musical like the DIC production did and the one song they included is short and sweet. I liked the idea of bookending it with Dickens telling the story, but if feels disingenuous to do that and then make this many drastic changes (especially the ridiculous mice). If this was a more accurate version, or they tried a modern take of the story, I think I may have liked it, but I can’t recommend this version as it is.

Christmas Carol: The Musical (2004)

This one is a live-action musical version that was made-for-TV an aired on NBC. A touring musical production was created with original songs by Alan Menken, who is famous for composing a number of Disney film soundtracks, and this is a filmed version of that production, featuring Kelsey Grammer (probably most well known for his role as Frasier Crane on Cheers and Frasier) as Scrooge.

We start with a barker announcing that the exchange will be closing early for Christmas. A man asks to see Ebeneezer Scrooge and says to his daughter that he’s sure that Scrooge will be sympathetic. A man laughs that someone thinks Scrooge could be sympathetic. Scrooge comes along with Cratchit assisting him.

A random man wishes him a Merry Christmas, to which he responds with his “stake of holly speech”. The man who was looking for him tells Scrooge that his wife has died and he needs more time to get money for his mortgage. “Am I charity!?”, bellows Scrooge. “You’ll learn soon enough that Christmas, is a humbug!”, he says to the daughter.

Three charity guys ask Scrooge for money, singing like a barbershop quartet. Scrooge sings a little bit about how the poor should work for it. Cratchit sings about getting off early. (The background string portions of the score sound a lot like the instrumentals from Beauty and the Beast, which was also done by Alan Menken)

Fred shows up on the street and sings an invitation to come to Christmas dinner. A kid sings to Scrooge and when he tells him to shut up, gets kicked by him. Scrooge gets briefly annoyed by a man wearing a sandwich board advertising a theater show. Jane Krakowski shows up as a lamplighter, who sings that he’ll regret not helping her with her money problems, and then a blind woman does the same. These three actors play the three spirits later on.

A young girl sings a song ending with “God bless us, everyone” and Scrooge seems a little shaken by it.

Bob stops home and celebrates with his family that he has the day off. He carries Tiny Tim out onto the street and they sing together before purchasing a chicken.

Scrooge hears a ghostly voice calling his name and then his door knocker transforms into Marley’s face. His caretaker comes out the door and asks if he’s seen a ghost, before saying she’ll bring some turkey and pudding in the morning. “Don’t waste my money or your time”, he replies. He makes his way to his bedroom and changes into his robes.

His fire begins to spew smoke, the walls shake, and Marley’s ghost bursts through the wall. Scrooge squints and says “Who are you?” A very underwhelming reaction to a ghost appearing in your bedroom. Marley is played by Jason Alexander, who famously played George Costanza on Seinfeld.

Marley’s Ghost has a huge plume of hair and gives Scrooge a hug, and hisses at Scrooge when he pokes at him. Marley begins to sing “Link by Link” describing how he forged his chains by being cruel in life and he warns Scrooge of 3 more spirits. While the song isn’t anything special, I had always read that Jason Alexander is surprisingly a trained singer, and I have to admit he does have a pretty powerful voice!

“You remember our colleague, Mr. Haine?”, Marley asks Scrooge. A body comes through the stretching floor like Freddy Krueger and he has a terrible looking CGI skull head. A number of other spirits with chains, disconnected heads and more come through and kind of dance, fly, and shuffle around, scaring Scrooge through song. It all looks a little hokey and then they disappear.

As Scrooge settles into bed, the ghost of Christmas Past arrives, looking like the lamplighter woman from before. She sings a song about the Lights of Long Ago. She opens a spectral book titled “The Life of Ebenezer Scrooge” and it has moving pictures inside that he views before she flies Scrooge out the window and into the past. I absolutely could not keep a straight face in these scenes, as the actress for the Spirit, Jane Krakowski, played the character Jenna Maroney on 30 Rock. Her character on that show was a desperate over-acting diva, and I couldn’t get it out of my head that it was Jenna in a production of A Christmas Carol. It doesn’t help any further that there is an episode of 30 Rock where Kelsey Grammar guest stars and he and Jenna form “The Best Friends Gang”, so it was like a bizarre backwards reunion for me.

Anyway, we see young Scrooge in a courtroom, where his father is sentenced to three years in debtors prison and he shouts back to his family to save every penny and work hard. Young Scrooge and Fan are sung to by their mother, who says she must send them away, but to not grow bitter.

Past explains that his mother died, and Scrooge and Fan were separated. We move forward to Scrooge working in a shoe factory. Young Scrooge writes a letter to Fan while singing and hopes they can be together soon, but Past points out that they weren’t as she died giving birth to Fred.

We move forward again to Fezziwig’s party, where we see young Scrooge and young Marley. The Spirit points out a woman who Scrooge remembers, Emily (not Belle), portrayed, oddly enough, by Jennifer Love Hewitt. Mr. and Mrs. Fezziwig sing a song about their annual Christmas ball with a large dance number, including a dance between young Scrooge and Emily.

After the dance ends,young Scrooge asks Emily to marry him, and she accepts the proposal. Scrooge and her sing a duet about their future together and old Scrooge joins in too.

Moving forward more, young Scrooge and young Marley have a montage of being shrewd moneylenders, including refusing a loan for Mr. Fezziwig. Emily arrives and gives Scrooge his ring back, who says he should be happy to have more gold. Old Scrooge demands that his younger self go after her.

Time moves forward to where Kelsey Grammar is now playing a slightly younger Scrooge and Jason Alexander is playing a living version of Marley. Marley doesn’t feel well and he keels over walking away from his desk. The Spirit appears as the smoke on Scrooge’s candle who says the past is the past, but Scrooge smothers the flame.

The Ghost of Christmas Present arrives, looking like the man holding the sandwich board who annoyed Scrooge earlier. Scrooge even asks him if he knows him. The Spirit sings a song about how Scrooge is a fool for not knowing how to keep Christmas. He transports Scrooge to a stage with a full audience and sings a song to the crowd with variety-show-like dance number about abundance, charity, and good will towards men, complete with backup dancers. Scrooge recognizes the girl he was rude to earlier in the audience and seems sheepish. The Spirit pulls Scrooge onto the stage and tries to get him to join into the dance, to no avail. Scrooge picks up a small present from the stage and throws it to the girl.

Finally, Scrooge and the Spirit take to the streets and recognize Tiny Tim. They head into the Cratchit house where Tiny Tim sings about how wonderful his Christmas will be and the rest of the Cratchits join in during their dinner celebration, where they toast to Scrooge.

The spirit and Scrooge take back to the streets, where the song continues being sung by the cityfolk. They move to Fred’s house, where Fred and the party goers continue the song but the lyrics change to hoping Scrooge will eventually attend. It builds to a montage of the Cratchits, Fred’s party, and the townsfolk all singing the song together.

Scrooge observes the Cratchits and sings a few bars about Tiny Tim.

The Spirit opens his cloak and shows Ignorance and Want, who look like some dirty and sad kids. Scrooge demands to know what he must do, but the Spirit disappears.

Scrooge appears in his bedroom and makes his way down the stairs, but is stopped by the blind woman from earlier, who is the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come. She spins and turns into a mummy-ish figure in rags. We cut to the cemetery, where a choir of gravediggers and monks sing a song listening to the sounds of the future, including “listen to the footsteps of the people who’ll be dancing on your grave”. Scrooge joins in and asks to see the future, even if it terrifies him.

The businessmen, the people selling things to Old Joe, and then the Cratchits mourning at Tiny Tim’s grave all appear in the cemetery and sing their way through the events. Scrooge is disturbed at Tiny Tim’s death. Finally the Spirit points to Scrooge’s grave, and Scrooge sings a sad song about seeing the error of his ways and asking for time to change.

The Spirit points him to the young girl from earlier who begins the “God bless us, everyone” song, while Scrooge and an increasingly large chorus begin to sing along with, including his mother and Fan. His tombstone cracks and the Spirit flies over him, which becomes his blankets as he wakes in his bedroom.

A young caroling boy knocks on his door and Scrooge pulls him into the house and has him run to the poulterer for the prize turkey. He kisses his housekeeper and wishes her a merry Christmas before heading outside, where he sings about giving to the poor. He runs into the man and girl who he refused to extend their mortgage and pays it off with more for them to buy gifts. He sees the sandwich board man, tips his hat to the lamplighter, and gives money to the blindwoman, who all sing about Christmas touching his heart.

He makes his way to the Cratchits and pretends to be angry before giving them the prize turkey, and then runs to Fred’s where he says he’s come to Christmas dinner. Scrooge and the cast sing one last song while Tiny Tim gives a “God bless us, everyone!” and we get an extremely cheesy freeze frame on Scrooge’s face before the cut to credits.

I was really disappointed in this version. It’s got a great cast, but with all of the songs taking the majority of the runtime, they don’t get much time to do anything. Kelsey Grammer starts off over-the-top in his Scrooge portrayal and gets much better towards the end, but I think the damage was already done. I was excited to see that the soundtrack was done by Alan Menken, so I was hopeful that it would be fun. Unfortunately, we get constantly barraged by songs and it feels more like a Stephen Sondheim musical where there is very little dialogue. None of the songs are very memorable or unique, so they tend to run together and it’s hard for me to differentiate where one begins and another ends. There were multiple times where I thought to myself that this would probably work well as a stage show, but it wasn’t really meant to be filmed as a movie (particularly the Ghost of Christmas Present song). As far as changes go, I don’t think any of them enhance the story. The scene with Scrooge’s father being thrown in prison is particularly awful. It’s way too on-the-nose. Scrooge becomes greedy as a young man and that’s a fine enough backstory. We don’t need some Freudian reason as to why that occurred. The Albert Finney “Scrooge” film has its problems, but it’s much better than this one and the Muppets still reign over having the best musical version so far. The competition is too stiff for this one to stand out.

Next time I’ll be looking at the most bizarre interpretation yet and I’ll also see if Looney Tunes can get it right the second time around.

Thanks for reading and have a merry Christmas!

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